Ho eh! YC Blog Revived! Pictures Re-Stolen! Nice right? The eye can move one leh. See carefully.

Ok, time for some thrash post! Eh, my live story. And the Reason I use the name DuMdUm. U know why? Cause 4-5 years ago I was a complete retard! And guess what... I'm still a fkin retard! So here's my post! Oh and its also the reason "1 wrong doing can leave you a lifetime of regret".

Wanna know what's my biggest regret? That's left a huge scar in my life? I BET YOU DON'T EVEN CARE! HOO!~~~~~~~~~


First off, lets start off with a story that happened say... 5 years ago? An incident which changed my life! The end of my secondary school days and the starting of a new chapter in life. A point of time where people have totally no clue what to do while waiting to go into Poly. Well i did job hop a little, but most of the times i spent unemployed. I would frequent the arcade at bugis. In my 1-2 years of my bugis life, I came to know the people who frequented the place and of course, quite a huge number of the people working there. At that point of time, I knew the people in the coffeeshop opposite mos burger. As i was just 16 years old, I had not developed the art of "Fine Dining" and everyday i would have the same dish for lunch and dinner... And it went on for probably... 1 year +? That's how i got the nick name in bugis "Chao Fan Boy". Imagine eating fried rice for 2 meals a day for over a year! Well, to me food was food. Not something i put any attention to... Well it so happened that on a fateful day, the daughter of the stall owner came to help out. Well, what could i say? My heart melted when i first saw her. After a very long and tedious process, I finally started to go out with her. And after 2 years, my chance came. She was having her O levels and i was giving tuition to my friends, so her parents asked me if i could help her with her studies. Of course, I agreed. I guess that was the time when we really started dating. We would talk everynight on the phone before going to sleep and meet every other day to study together. However, we usually didnt study much but went shopping quite a lot. Well, i guess when your heart belongs to someone, you naturally want the best for the person. Wouldn't you? Anyway, everytime we went out it would be my treat. I didn't want her to spend her money when i was with her. It didn't seem right. I guess that's how u are when you're in love? You just want to provide and shelter your loved one at all costs? Anyway, she would tell me it was ok and that I didn't have to treat her everytime. ? . No that didnt seem right to me, I'm a guy. I should be able to provide. Shouldn't I? I mean as long as its within my means I would do it. Without a shadow of doubt. Well, she introduced her friends... bought me a handphone couple keychain (it was the "in" thing that time)... had dinner with her parents... All that stuff. But what's the greatest joke of it all? I had no clue that she had accepted me into her life. I didn't know that we were together. If all those signs were obvious to everyone else in the world... It wasnt to me. I was young and plain stupid. I was brought up in a "pro gaming" community where people played games competitively and watched each others backs. Where teamwork and collective teamspirit was the culture. We were the best at gaming and ranked in asia, and I was core of the team. I built the team. Everything i knew, was in gaming. Everything else? I was completely unaware. Although those signs were drop dead obvious, it never occured so to me. In my mind, couples hold hands and stuff like that. (Nowhere near indecency. I may be potent but I have an incredible degree of self control and being brought up in a chinese school, deep morals). In short, I had no clue what was going on. Well, this went on for quite some time a nd one day... One fateful day, my sister asked me how was things going on with me and her? Well since I didn't know if i could or should... and i lacked the moral courage to try to hold her hand, it never occured to me we were together. Hey i was young. Give me some slack. Anyway, my sister wasnt really sure of the situation and asked me if I thought the relationship was going anywhere. That made me ponder. And in doubt? Question. And like a retard, I told the girl i gave my hear t to that i was treating her too good and I didn't think our friendship had any progress and was rather stagnant. To which she gave a shocking reply. She asked me - how could i think like that? That i was treating her very good and no progress? If i really thought that way then maybe we shouldn't be going out - . I didn't know what she meant. But i took the last sentence as advice. We stopped going out. Well what an ass i must have been. She subsequently told me that she's changing her handphone no. and dun need to contact or look for her again. U know what i thought? I thought that it was some time away to think and so i thought that would be for the best.

It was only after several months of self reflection and thought, that made me wake up my idea. It was too to make any amends, but i swore that I would not have such a thought anymore. And if i ever did fall in love with anyone, I would give it all i got, and never give up.

But we're only human. And never is a very very very long time. At this current moment, I'm faced with a problem that's haunted me for so many years. Deja Vu! I've been going out with a girl for close to 2 years. And again, I've hit the invisible wall of progression to a relationship. But this time it's a little more tricky. Cause sometimes she tells me that she'll always be there for me, that she has feelings for me... That yes she does love me. However, some of the times she tells me that maybe we were not meant for each other. It's been 2 years of courtship and I can't read the signs and patterns anymore. Pls would someone guide me as to how I should confront this situation? How would you handle such a situation to see if it has any hope of moving forward? Or is the relationship doomed to oblivion. I've made the wrong choice once... I wouldnt want to make the same mistake twice and live with regret.

What to do? HO EH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(0) So Waddaya Think! 5:15:00 PM